I'm gonna show you how to fight, so you'd better take notes!
GW: At least I can write, you illiterate prick
You couldn't read 'til you were twelve 'cause your mind was sick!
KG: You do realize that I'm the big K-G-3
-And you're just some doofus who cut a cherry tree?
GW: Big as in the size of your daft royal head?
You think you're some war general, but all you've got in there is lead!
KG: My war strategies are top notch- now you know that ain't no puzzle
So shut your mouth 'homedog', before I get you a muzzle!
GW: Your 'strategies' are lame, for as the Yankees would say,
We can see those bright red coats from a mile away!
KG: It doesn't matter if you can see the very whites of our eyes
You could be staring right us, and we'd still take you by surprise.
GW: Speaking 'bout surprises, what about your disease
and how you think that you're dying every time that you sneeze
Your illness makes you crazy- guess that's why you tell us lies
Here's a straitjacket- why don't you try it on for size?
KG: Oh, you foolish little Yank, you have an eye to observe
But sit down at the table because you're about to be served!
You Yankees gonna hate me 'cause I be taxing your tea
But you've only got your 'country' through my family!
GW: We don't care who paid for our land, and quite frankly,
We've all come to these colonies just so we can be free.
Your redcoats better watch it 'cause we're playing to win
And your interference is like one giant sin!
I can hardly hear ya' over your porphyria,
And you think future rulers should mirror ya'?
KG: So clever, my dear Patriot, but my wisdom still rings
and these battles- rap and revolution- aren't over 'til the fat lady sings.
GW: So Queen Charlotte will be joining us? Oh, what an occasion!
Her vocals will easily be scarier than than your bloodyback invasion.
KG: Your 'country's' freedom is sinking-
GW: Ahh, that's just wishful thinking.
You want to keep your precious colonies from merging into one.
Well, good luck with that. Wake me up when we've won.
Who do you think won? And who should be in the next rap battle?